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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25562029">Up a Creek</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/zombie_honeymoon/pseuds/zombie_honeymoon'>zombie_honeymoon</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Naruto</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Covid19 related, Fifteen Minute Fic, Gen, Gen Work, Roommates, Short One Shot, Swearing</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 12:22:34</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>684</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25562029</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/zombie_honeymoon/pseuds/zombie_honeymoon</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Deidara plays a prank on his roommates with their very last roll of toilet paper.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Deidara &amp; Hidan (Naruto), Hidan &amp; Hoshigaki Kisame</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Up a Creek</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This is covid-19 related though it's implied and not actually mentioned. And Hidan works out naked because why not?</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was when Hidan reached for the toilet paper that he saw it.</p>
<p><em><em>‘Don’t Panic!’ </em></em>was scrawled on the empty toilet paper roll in big letters with black sharpie. He recognized the writing immediately.</p>
<p>“Deidara!” He shouted from where he sat on the toilet, “You fucking asshole!”</p>
<p>That had been the very last roll! His roommate was dead. Just as soon as he figured out what he was going to do and get himself out of the bathroom.</p>
<p>The sound of raucous laughter came from down the hall followed by voices and Deidara called out, “Sounds like you’re up shit creek!” Which was followed by more laughter.</p>
<p>“Bastards.” Hidan bit out. He sat there for several minutes thinking through his options. He could peel the empty toilet paper roll apart and use that. But then his eyes landed on the shower. It was fully stocked with shower gel, a couple of bars of soaps and shampoo. He needed a shower anyways, and would actually get clean. No way was he wiping his ass with cardboard!</p>
<hr/>
<p>Fifteen minutes later-- fresh, clean and dry, with nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist, Hidan stepped out of the bathroom and made a beeline straight for Deidara’s room. He didn’t bother to knock, just threw open the door and stalked in.</p>
<p>“You bitch. You used the last of the toilet paper.”</p>
<p>“Oh, you noticed? Hope you didn’t wipe your ass on the towels, un,” Deidara laughed, though there was a hint of apprehension in his voice.</p>
<p>“Is that what you're planning to do?”</p>
<p>“That’s nasty!”</p>
<p>“You’re nasty! You did that on purpose!” Hidan lunged at him, pinning him to the bed and shoving his face into the pillow with his hand, “You’re going to go to the fucking store and buy some more! The good kind, not that one-ply sandpaper shit!”</p>
<p>“I’ll buy some, but it’ll be for me!” He twisted, trying to get the upper hand, and then went to grab the towel from around his waist, “Let me up!”</p>
<p>“Not until you agree to buy toilet paper!”</p>
<p>“I’m not buying you shit!” He yanked on the towel and it fell away.</p>
<p>“If you wanted to see my dick, all you had to do was come watch me work out!”</p>
<p>“Why do you think I avoid the garage when you work out?! Who the hell works out naked?! Get out of my room!”</p>
<p>Then suddenly the lights went off then on again, over and over and Hidan and Deidara stopped struggling with each other to turn and look at the doorway, “What the fuck, Kisame.” Hidan deadpanned, “Stop that!”</p>
<p>“Yeah, stop it! That’s annoying, we’re not kids!”</p>
<p>“Children, children,” Kisame sighed, as if he had to break up their fights several times a day, “Enough. Hidan, if you don’t want to go to the store because you’re scared, order your toilet paper online and have it delivered. Deidara,” Kisame grinned, “that was hilarious!”</p>
<p>“Fuck you!”</p>
<p>“Ha! Take that, Hidan!” Deidara stuck his tongue out and shoved him off, “Get out of my room and put some clothes on, then go order your own toilet paper since you’re too scared to go buy some.”</p>
<p>Hidan kicked his legs before leaving, Kisame stepped out of the way to let him out of the bedroom.</p>
<p>“I’m going to the store, Hidan, you can come with me if you want. You just have to put some clothes on.” Kisame offered as he followed Hidan towards the kitchen, “You could do with some time out of the house.”</p>
<p>“I’m fine,” Hidan pouted, “I’ll just order my toilet paper.”</p>
<p>“Scaredy-cat!” Deidara shouted from his room.</p>
<p>“I’m not scared!” Hidan shouted back, then grabbed his wallet from the kitchen table and took out a handful of bills, “Kisame,” he smiled sweetly, “buy me some toilet paper and ice cream, please?”</p>
<p>“Don’t do it!” Deidara yelled from the other side of the house he was now on.</p>
<p>Hidan knew Kisame would cave, if he just looked cute enough, and sure enough, moments later Kisame took the money from Hidan, asking what flavor he wanted.</p>
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